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Readers Respond: What role does the father take in your family? How does he help out?

Responses: 8

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From the article: Dads and Homeschooling
Dads are involved in many ways in the homeschooling of their children, some more than others. It's helpful to hear about what others are doing. What is your family's experience? What role does the father take? How does he help out?

The Great Pretender

My husband is the great pretender and pretends he's helping to teach our girls! When he's NOT. He knows more about sports stats then about homeschooling and doesn't seem to care. This has caused considerable damage to our "relationship" and he's not totally at fault. In my busyness I've done everything and enabled him. I discovered a free curriculum website wherein the wife of a homeschooling family made GREAT PLANS, gathered, books, supplies etc. readying herself to teach, neatly organized all in a file cabinet by child. Her GREAT PLANS had one major flaw - She didn't account for her DEATH and DIE she did! Leaving her husband with 5 children and a newborn and info he had no clue how to use! Relaying this story to my husband did not motivate him! Only hardship seems to motivate him. ALL this being said, couples must be honest about their their role in homeschooling. Otherwise a happy home will not be had.
—Guest Genus

Dads helping out homeschooling

My husband is not an organized person, so would find it stressful to work the way I teach my two girls, with somewhat of a routine and method. We use a curriculum that took me awhile to get used to, and he wouldn't have the desire to want to learn all that. I do ask him to hear my 9 yr old read to him at the weekend, and my 5 yr old to play games and I think that is important. It is fun time for them together. But I think that a partner can help out a lot by just being there as the other parent and adult. Supporting and balancing the adult needs of the HS'ing Mom's (or Dad's) life. In my case, I am home and in the presence of wonderful children, but sure enough children, all day, all week. Because I don't go out of the house to work, it can become a little intense. I think that is where another adult can ease and balance life, and make everything more handl'able to continue on well. I am currently in the process of trying to get my husband to understand that concept, (smile!)
—Guest cody

He doesn't do the "curriculum" stuff...

...but he does other things. When he's messing around with his saltwater tanks, he talks to the kids about what he's doing. When he's building something in the basement, he brings them down and hands them a hammer and nails. He showed our daughter the "right way" to hold her pencil for drawing since he's more of an artist than I am. He participates in some of our co-op classes and field trips with us and is even going to participate in some of the "dad-led classes" we're incorporating. He takes our daughter to work with him sometimes (he owns his own business). He sits down and plays board games with us. He'll join in on science experiments, conversations, outings. If I get a little stuck on math (yes, even fourth grade math- I was never a strong math person and joke that I'm lucky I know how many apples I have if I have three apples) I can call him in and make him show us both how to do it... :) He's been really great about joining in, in his own way, and about supporting what I do!
—sahmiam3

Busy Dads

I used to find it difficult to draw my husband into the classroom with our four children. One day I was sitting at the table with our children and one of my sons asked a question about Dad's job. I answered him with what I thought was true. Well my husband overheard us talking as he has his office in our home. He came in and asked, "What did you just tell him? No NO NO, this is what it is." I sat and listened as my husband explained to our four kids about his job as an Insurance Appraiser and he was excited to share with them and he showed them some pictures of wrecked cars on his computer that he had looked at. I thought he would stop soon, but then he pulled out a science book and began to explain how a car going 30 miles an hour can hit a non moving car with such force causing such damage. The kids loved the time with Dad and they asked a lot of questions. I have since stretched the truth about my knowledge of many things, and sure enough within minutes I hear my husband coming!
—Guest Kim Duff

Dad and Homeschooling

My husband works nights and I work days. My hours are 8:00-2:00 and we have a few hours in the afternoon together before hubbby goes to work. Dad takes son to library and other activities. I usually do the teaching stuff except math and science in which Dad takes over. Dad has gotten my son to think more outside the box. They have done experiments in which they found bees to produce electricity. Bees have a lot of energy and they found an old bees nest but the comb was warm. Could bees actually be useful to produce electricity? We are still working on that one! They have done experiments using batteries as a source of magnetic energy and have experimented with flies trying to prove a 4th dimension. Ever notice how flies just seem to disappear and reappear? How do they squeeze into small spaces? These are still be discovered! My son also raises backyard chickens and ducks another project Dad got him involved in. My son has learned a lot about chickens.
—Guest LC

Ask Questions

I try not to pressure my husband into feeling he has to make decisions. Instead, I ask him for his advice on certain things, and that seems to open him up. He is an active-duty soldier, so whenever he has leave time we plan family mini-trips in order to explore exciting places together. He is much more involved when we do things all together. He also enjoys just being "dad" when the kids have free time, rather than having the burden of juggling work and teaching the kids.
—Guest deldobuss

Try to touch his ego...

... feeling an important part is good to the process. You can note what areas your husband likes and he is good to teach; for example: my husband took 2 of the children to a laboratory in his job one Saturday. He was very proud to show his work and they loved it. Of course they learned to use a microscope and they saw some new things there. When we have problems in math, I ask him for help and when we have the test results the child shows him. I hope it works for you. Sorry about my English, I´m from Guatemala and I speak it a little.
—Guest lidia

Home School Dad

My husband is a very good home schooling dad. He works nights and I work days so that home schooling can be accomplished. I discuss with my son the things he wants to learn over the week from selected materials and my husband makes sure it is done and correct. He also helps with the math. My husband takes my son to the library one day a week and shopping and to the feed store. My son has learned alot being with his dad. When I come home from work I go over the days events with my son and any lessons that need to be covered or corrected. On weekends we like to do the field trips as a family and we attend our local place of worship together. we try and get cleaning done together. It's a good experience.
—Guest Lisa Cabello

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